{"id":10582,"date":"2018-02-14T22:15:55","date_gmt":"2018-02-14T20:15:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/?p=10582"},"modified":"2018-02-15T06:25:18","modified_gmt":"2018-02-15T04:25:18","slug":"ma-iubeste-femeilefrantuzoaica","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/?p=10582","title":{"rendered":"M\u0103 iube\u0219te femeile:”Fran\u021buzoaic\u0103”"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>\n

Data stelar\u0103 14 Februarie, jurnalul c\u0103pitanului plecat dup\u0103 nachos la Auchan, exact cum am spus ieri.<\/p>\n

Am luat \u0219i ni\u0219te alte \u0103lea pentru fete. \u00cen m\u00e2na cu o pung\u0103 merg la un bar de la Food Court care are nachos ca la cinematograf. Doamna de acolo spala chestii in chiuvet\u0103 se preg\u0103te\u0219te s\u0103 \u00eenchid\u0103.<\/p>\n

O gagic\u0103 care st\u0103tea la mas\u0103 se bag\u0103 \u00een seam\u0103 cu mine:<\/p>\n

-Ce dori\u021bi.<\/p>\n

Credeam c\u0103 e patroana sau chelneri\u021b\u0103 \u0219i o \u00eentreb dac\u0103 :<\/p>\n

– Lucra\u021bi aici?<\/p>\n

D\u0103 din umeri \u0219i m\u0103 \u00eentreab\u0103 dac\u0103 vorbesc englez\u0103. Zic c\u0103 ies \u0219i o \u00eentreb acela\u0219i lucru.<\/p>\n

Dup\u0103 care m\u0103 \u00eentreab\u0103 dac\u0103 vorbesc francez\u0103. B\u0103, pula mea…<\/p>\n

-Oui, je peux parler un peu de francaise. Est ce que vous travaillez ici?<\/p>\n

Io tot cu nacho\u0219ii aveam treaba, dar pula r\u0103spuns la \u00eentrebarea mea:<\/p>\n

-Je viens de France, je suis Nicoleta.<\/p>\n

Nicom\u0103-ta. \u0218i \u00eentinde m\u00e2na. Sunt un domn, Catalin, anceant\u00e9, anceant\u00e9 osi \u0219i d-\u0103stea, dar pe mine nu m\u0103 auzea fata care sp\u0103la chestii \u00een chiuvet\u0103. O las pe fran\u021buzoaic\u0103 s\u0103-\u0219i \u00eentoarc\u0103 inelul cu floricic\u0103 \u00een sus \u0219i \u00eei spun duduii care chiar lucra acolo s\u0103-mi dea \u0103ia.<\/p>\n

Coaie, a\u0219a fac toate, stau cu inelele \u0103lea s\u00e2rm\u0103 cu floarea \u00een jos, gen sunt luat\u0103 ( probabil de la prea mult cox) \u0219i c\u00e2nd g\u0103sesc ele de cuviin\u021b\u0103, pac floarea \u00een sus. Voiam s\u0103 zic pizda. \u0218i dup-aia #mehehehetooo. Eu nu aveam timp de vr\u0103jeli, dar pot s-o ard aiurea \u00eentr-o discu\u021bie ( c\u00e2t\u0103 vreme doar m\u0103 uit \u0219i n-ating nimic cre’ c\u0103 e \u00eenc\u0103 safe), da’ tipa era nu c\u0103 ur\u00e2t\u0103, c\u0103 \u0103stea-s chestii subiective, dar un pic mai stramb\u0103 dec\u00e2t mine. Un pic bine gen.<\/p>\n

\u0218i vreun cap jum\u0103tate peste mine. Nu c\u0103 asta ar fi de r\u0103u. De r\u0103u e c\u0103 dup\u0103 nas cred c\u0103 avea pula mai mare ca a mea, nasul sigur era.<\/p>\n

C\u00e2t m\u0103 ajuta doamna cu cutiile de tortilia s\u0103 le pun \u00een ceva staniol \u0219i-ntr-o pung\u0103, s\u0103 nu le v\u0103rs pe drum c\u0103 sunt \u00een stare, gagica se holba a\u0219a insistent la mine, cum m\u0103 mai holbez \u0219i eu uneori, de sim\u021beam \u0219i \u00eentors cu spatele ni\u0219te raze laser pe geac\u0103.<\/p>\n

Mai \u00eencearc\u0103 o conversa\u021bie gen mergi s\u0103 vezi un film?<\/p>\n

-Oui, je veux voir un film a ma maison, avec ma femme<\/b>.<\/p>\n

Pula mea, probabil trebuia s\u0103 \u00eentorc \u0219i eu verigheta vreo 720 de grade s\u0103 vad\u0103 c\u0103 n-am nicio floricic\u0103.<\/p>\n

Dezam\u0103git\u0103 ( pula mea, cred \u0219i eu – s\u0103 stai singur\u0103 la mas\u0103 pe 14 februarie c-o sticl\u0103 de bere \u00een fa\u021b\u0103, e amar\u0103 via\u021ba) \u00eemi spune:<\/p>\n

-Ai grij\u0103! c\u0103 st\u0103teau s\u0103-mi cad\u0103 toate alea.<\/p>\n

Eu continui \u00een francez\u0103, pula mea.<\/p>\n

-C’est bien, merci!<\/p>\n

\u00cemi iau catrafusele \u0219i m\u0103 tirez. La care se hlize\u0219te \u0219i-mi spune c\u0103 vorbe\u0219te \u0219i rom\u00e2ne\u0219te.<\/p>\n

Normal, \u00een pula mea, doar ai spus c\u0103 te cheama Nicoleta, nu Nicollette, sau Nicole.<\/i><\/p>\n

Ridic din umeri a pagub\u0103 \u0219i plec.<\/p>\n

\u00cen fine, nu spun ce spun ca s\u0103 m\u0103 laud c\u0103 ce june cu succes la femei sunt eu \u0219i cum las femeile late cu z\u00e2mbetul meu str\u0103lucitor ( e de la aparatul dentar). Ci c\u0103 via\u021ba nu-i mi\u0219to pentru toat\u0103 lumea \u0219i 14 februarie e de c\u0103cat c\u00e2nd e\u0219ti singur, dar probabil \u0219i celelalte zile, dac\u0103 ajungi s-ag\u0103\u021bi b\u0103rba\u021bi cu dou\u0103 palme mai scunzi, mai b\u0103tr\u00e2ni, nici prea frumo\u0219i, \u0219i nu-mi curgeau, b\u0103i, nici dolarii \u00een valuri din \u0219li\u021b.<\/p>\n

\u0218i nici nu ai sceneta de f\u0103cut pe interesantul bine pus\u0103 la punct.<\/p>\n

\u0218i m\u0103-ntreb a\u0219a cam cum func\u021bioneaz\u0103 chestia asta. Adic\u0103, eu cred c\u0103 pot s\u0103 num\u0103r pe degete ocaziile \u00een care o femeie s-a dat la mine ( nu vorbesc de \u0103lea din cluburile de striptease sau \u0103lea din cluburi de pe unde aruncam bani aiurea), dar nu prea reac\u021bionez pozitiv . Restul b\u0103rba\u021bilor sunt alt fel \u0219i de obicei merge a\u0219a?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Data stelar\u0103 14 Februarie, jurnalul c\u0103pitanului plecat dup\u0103 nachos la Auchan, exact cum am spus ieri. Am luat \u0219i ni\u0219te alte \u0103lea pentru fete. \u00cen…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":10581,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1244,1],"tags":[2325],"class_list":["post-10582","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-bucuresti","category-uncategorized","tag-frantuzoaica"],"views":3173,"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/04d1b90b28b34a48d702e018fa012272-pin-up-art-cartoon-girls.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4Eq23-2KG","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10582","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=10582"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10582\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10586,"href":"https:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10582\/revisions\/10586"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/10581"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=10582"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=10582"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/catalinx.ro\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=10582"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}